It all started with a lump

I've been asked many times how my cancer was detected, usually coupled with an assumption that it was during a mammogram. But I'm 7 years away from having my first routine mammogram. It all started with feeling a lump. I don't remember exactly what I was doing, but I bumped my breast and it was painful, so I felt the area and noticed a pretty sizable lump in the upper quadrant of the right breast. Because of its location, size, and the pain, I knew that it was something new and it caused some concern. So, the next day I called my women's health provider and explained what I felt. I also told her that I was leaving for vacation the next day. She said that it wasn't an emergency and that generally cancer didn't appear suddenly and wasn't usually painful. She did want to see me so we scheduled an appointment for when I came back from vacation. I went off to Colorado and Florida, trying not to worry about the lump, but concerned that it was painful. I did not think that it was cancer--I thought that it was probably a cyst and I just hoped that I didn't have to have surgery to deal with it.

The day before I came back from vacation I called too see if there were any cancellations and got earlier appointment, for the day after I got back. So, on March 31st, I went and had an exam. The NP saw that there was a sizable lump (duh!) and also felt one in the left breast. She sent me to Swedish Comprehensive Breast Center for an ultrasound. She told me that it was likely not cancer and was probably a cyst.

When I got to my appointment at the breast center the following week I had to have a mammogram (ouch!) and then an ultrasound. They didn't see anything on the left breast, but confirmed a large mass on the right. The radiologist said that it was likely a cyst--a fluid-filled sac--and that they would see me again to drain the fluid and take a biopsy. The aspiration and biopsy was scheduled for April 12th, less than two weeks after my initial appointment. When the radiologist inserted the needle to aspirate what we believed was a cyst, she was unable to get any fluid. It was a solid mass. She took a couple of samples, told me that it was likely a fibroadenoma (a non-cancerous tumor) and that the pathology report would take two days. That was the first time that I even entertained the possibility that it could be cancer, but it really seemed like a remote possibility. I have no family history of breast cancer and I'm only 33. Plus, my husband just died for goodness sake! I can't have cancer too.

The next day was April 13th--it would have been Gessner's 34th birthday. I dreaded the day because I should have been celebrating my husband's like, not facing the reality that he was dead. I didn't know what to do for the day and finally decided on keeping myself distracted. I had acupuncture and then coffee with a good friend. I decided to go to grief art therapy that night and had a few hours before that started, so went to University Village for a little retail therapy. I parked my car and got close to the shops when my cell phone rang. It was a local number, but not one that I recognized. I picked it up and it was Dr. Browning for Swedish Breast Center. She had my pathology report. She was sorry to tell me that it is cancer. Is at on a bench, completely floored. I grabbed a notebook out of my purse and started writing information down. Invasive Ductual Carcinoma. Most common form of breast cancer. Appointment with a surgeon. Telephone numbers. Names. I said goodbye and she expressed her sympathy again.

I started to make phone calls, relaying the news, still in disbelief. I got another call from a nurse, saying that they found me an earlier appointment with a surgeon. And then the whirlwind started.